Like An Eagle...

Live Video streaming by Ustream
I found out about this live cam of an eagle's nest in Iowa.  It is has been so cool to watch.  The pair now have 3 little ones.  If you watch for very long you get to see how attentive the parents are to their little ones.  It actually has surprised me how much they are aware of what their little ones are doing.  They have built the nest up around them more and more as they have grown. (Good thing because that nest is 80 feet off the ground!)
I thought I remembered a verse in scripture that talked about God caring for His people the way an eagle cares for their young and I found it.

Deuteronomy 32:9-14
“For the people of Israel belong to the Lord;
Jacob is his special possession.
He found them in a desert land,
in an empty, howling wasteland.
He surrounded them and watched over them;
he guarded them as he would guard his own eyes.
Like an eagle that rouses her chicks
and hovers over her young,
so he spread his wings to take them up
and carried them safely on his pinions.
The Lord alone guided them;
they followed no foreign gods.
He let them ride over the highlands
and feast on the crops of the fields.
He nourished them with honey from the rock
and olive oil from the stony ground.
He fed them yogurt from the herd
and milk from the flock,
together with the fat of lambs.
He gave them choice rams from Bashan, and goats,
together with the choicest wheat.
You drank the finest wine,
made from the juice of grapes.


Reminds me to look around and be thankful for all the ways the Lord is hemming me in, protecting me, nourishing me, and providing for me!

Give Thanks to the Lord...

Today is one really long date with God.  Part of it is reading through the book, One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  One year ago this week started this chain of loss and change which has lead to lots of grief and struggle.
This morning already the book has challenged me in what I am doing in the midst of the hard to be thankful.  Am I willing to be thankful for EVERYTHING that God gives, including what He chooses to take away?  And so I am wrestling and was challenged as I got to Psalm 136 to write my own Psalm of Praise to the Lord, thanking Him for ALL things and remembering...

Psalm 136... changed up for where I am today!

Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good!
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to God who is greater than any thing.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to the Lord who is worthy of all our praise.
His faithful love endures forever.

Give thanks to Him who alone can save.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to Him who made the mountains, oceans and trees...
His faithful love endures forever.
And flowers and creatures and the breeze.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to Him who made the stars...
His faithful love endures forever.
And the sun to shine to remind us of whose we are.
His faithful love endures forever.

Give thanks to Him who saved me from eternal death.
His faithful love endures forever.
He brought me to Himself to rest.
His faithful love endures forever.
He's changed my heart of stone to flesh.
His faithful love endures forever.
And showed me my need of His unfailing love.
His faithful love endures forever.

He's given me community to sharpen and to guide.
His faithful love endures forever.
And He's shown me that I can never hide.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to Him for always providing for my needs.
His faithful love endures forever.
And showing me it's about relationship not things.
His faithful love endures forever.

He has carried me through many a loss,
His faithful love endures forever.
And reminded me it's for His Glory, the cost.
His faithful love endures forever.
He's called me to thanksgiving,
His faithful love endures forever.
remembering, and praise.
His faithful love endures forever.
And that He can handle the "why questions" I raise!
His faithful love endures forever.

By myself I can not make it,
His faithful love endures forever.
But He promises me He is enough.
His faithful love endures forever.
Even when it seems crazy,
His faithful love endures forever.
I will stop and say, "not my will but yours be done!"
His faithful love endures forever.

Chameleons and Eggs

Have you ever taken a personality test?  You know, the ones that tell you if you are a red left brained golden retriever that leans towards depression! I'm not a real big fan of the tests for a couple of reasons.
First, I always find myself trying to figure out what all the questions really mean and what they are trying to push me towards.  Some of this is just how my brain functions and then some of it is because I have struggled with how I am wired.  So if I fool the test I can be someone else :)
Second, I often find myself in this weird middle ground on these tests.  This weird balance of left brain right brain or towards the middle on introvert and extrovert.  Or when I take the test a second time I have changed and then I wonder which one I really am!
Like in the movie Runaway Bride... There is a part in the movie where she realizes that she doesn't know what kind of eggs she likes.  She just always likes the kind of eggs of the guy she is dating.  There have been times where I find myself being a chameleon and just fitting into what works best in the moment.  At times I think I did this out of ease... and then others because I didn't like who I was.  I think over the last 10 years I have really grabbed a hold of who I am and have become more and more thankful for who I am.
Thirdly, in regards to these tests, I think I also feel like it is not okay to just settle right on in to who these tests say we are and just sit there.  God's work in our lives moves us, changes us and molds us to be more like His Son.  And so we shouldn't be settling in and becoming static.
And lastly in 38 years I think there are things about me that have changed a lot and somethings, so I am told, that have been here the whole time.
So why am I talking about all of this anyway?  This past week we talked about our strengths in our team meeting that come from the book Strengths Finder.  I had taken the test 2 time previously with only 2 of my 5 remaining the same, thus making me wonder which were really true.  Then I decided to just read all the descriptions and figure out what I think my 5 are.  And again, the 2 in common remain and the other 3 changed, again! It revealed some good stuff.  As I read through my strengths, according to this book, I didn't necessarily learn a new thought about me and how I'm wired.  But I did learn some new things about how I like to be lead and encouraged.  Or maybe it's clarity on things that I already knew about myself.  Either way... it was some great info.
And I was reminded that it is a good thing to be able to share with those around you what helps you, what encourages you, and to be honest about what hurts you.  It's not always easy, but it sure does deepen the relationship.
So what am I really trying to say?  I'm not totally sure...
Maybe... be honest with those you live life with and know what kind of eggs you like?

Photo of eggs from recipegoldmine.com and chameleons from David R Parks and Robert Siegel.

5 Highlights from My Week... Plus a Bonus!

My brain is swirling in processing and so I will refrain from puking on all of you!
So here are some highlights from my week... Enjoy!

1) A song that really spoke to me this week...



2) A blog that taught me and reminded me of truth...

Is this how He feels?

3) A video that made me laugh...



4) A verse sent to me that was a great encouragement...

When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
Ephesians 3:14-19


5) I ate the chicken chipotle enchiladas at this restaurant and was amazed!

Amigos

Hope one of all of them encourage you!  Or at least give you a good laugh!

Oh and... bonus... This video is amazing...


G.O.S.P.E.L. from Humble Beast Records on Vimeo.

Arboretum Take 37!

I just can't get enough of the arboretum in the spring time!

And taking pictures of this awesome family!

Super Moon!

Tonight there was a SUPERMOON!  Who actually knew!
It was amazing to see, and so stinkin' hard to actually get a picture of!  Here are my my few favs...

Exercise of Choice

I haven't blogged in a while because I have wrestled with whether or not I could post my thoughts.  Truth is, I am wrestling with God again.  It seems to be my most favored choice of exercise.  Too bad it doesn't tone up my physical heart like it does my soul!
My struggle is nothing new, in fact it feels like an old one that has resurfaced.  I want to be married!  There I said it!  It actually isn't an easy thing for me to say, hence where lots of the wrestling comes in.  The desire has always been there, but it has been somewhat dormant until 6 or 8 months ago.  I noticed that it started to weigh more in my thoughts, that I was more aware of what I wanted.  And then of course that put me into the struggle.  The struggle of wondering why the Lord has "kept it from me."  Now I realize that is not the greatest way to look at it, but at times it does feel that way.
I want to pause here and say... when I look back at the last 9 years of my life, I can not imagine it being different than it was.  I have LOVED all that I have been given the privilege of being a part of.  I know that it would have all looked drastically different if I had been in a different life stage. I know that I have gotten to go and do a lot because I am single.  I know there are people's lives I have been involved in because I'm unattached.  And I really would not change any of it!
But for whatever reason, the desire has risen to the surface again and I'm not sure what to do with it.  You see there is more to the struggle than just wanting to be married. I find myself wrestling with whether or not I want to actually pray for a husband.  This is going to sound somewhat crazy, but I am afraid of what might happen.  So much of what has happened in my life has been by faith and obedience.  I have had to release what I want so that God could be glorified with the plan He was unfolding.  And yet it took work on me and it was not always easy and yet it always changed me, and I do believe for the better.
But I have this fear that praying for a husband is going to call for the same action and I am scared.  I'm scared He is going to take me to places I will not want to go or will be afraid to go or will "change my mind about wanting it."  I know you might be thinking I am nuts, or that this seems a little dramatic.  (I do have a little drama in me.)
And so I am wrestling.  Wrestling with why God has chosen to put me where I am.  Wrestling with the questions... Are you being most glorified with me single?  Is this where you have chosen to put me and you are choosing this for me for good?  Is it because I am fearful that you have not brought him in? Am I hoping for something that is not going to happen?
It is also tempting to start asking these questions... Is there something wrong with me?  Am I not being "available" enough? Is it because I have chosen to work in Family Ministry on church staff that has kept me single? (Although that one gets trumped real fast because I do believe I have been right where He called me to be.) Actually I guess a lot of questions get trumped because I do believe I have been walking in obedience to where I have been called.
And so this morning I was journaling once again with all of this, all the questions of why and then the fears associated with asking for what I think I want.  And I'll throw another piece out there... I also fear that I will ask for it and God will give it to me, but not because it is what He has for me.  See also the Israelites asking for a king!  But this morning I read a devotional where the verse in Matthew 11:26 was quoted...
Yes, Father, it pleased you to do it this way.
And I was once again reminded of God's sovereignty.  Of His being fully in control.  And then I kept reading and of course it gets to one of the most famous parts of scripture....
Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
I think wrestling will forever be a part of who I am. Most of the time I am thankful that God created me this way and I am all the time thankful that He loves me and can handle all of it.
And so... off to recover a little from my exercising and rest by placing all of this in His very capable hands!  At least for a little while!

Photo taken by Kevin McConaghy.