Sunday, December 19, 2010

Choosing Christmas

Is it horrible to say that I am ready for 2010 to be over?  It kinda makes me sad that 2010 was such a difficult year.  I think the number itself just seems cool.  But I am ready.  I am ready to move on to 2011.
Now I realize I can't put a whole bunch of my hope in 2011 being this amazingly different year.  It might not be.  And the hard might not be over (although if I am honest, I am kinda banking that I am in the healing stages here.)
I don't like that I am dreading Christmas.  It is here... in just 6 days.  And yet it is going to be tough one.  A really hard reminder of who isn't here and all the loss. But I want to remember what this season is really all about and as much as I love the lights, giving, the cold weather, family, traditions, trees, fun movies, cider, and holidays treats it is about so much more.
It's about the life saving gift that was given for us.  That God came to us to make a way for us.  That in all the sadness I feel, in the battle with depression, in the moments when I just want to sit and cry... a reminder that He came to redeem all of that.  He came so I can have hope of what is to come.  Hope of the day when all of those things will be wiped away.  But to have that, He had to leave HEAVEN to dwell among us.  He had to choose to take the cup and choose to die.
I'm prayer for a miracle in my body... praying I can have joy in the midst of sorrow.  Praying I can celebrate and BELIEVE that He is writing a story far beyond what I can imagine.  And I know that with Him it is possible.  
Thank you Jesus for choosing Christmas!

1 comment:

  1. Praying for you Suzanne. I hope this is a special Christmas with your family, full of many happy memories, even as they're accompanied by the tears.